My friend Cory and I made this cause I had to for my pyschology class last year...it's hella funny!
1- If I could have chosen my first, middle, and last names it would be Shaniqa Rose Hilton. I chose Shaniqa cause I am
black and it's a classic name. I chose Rose because roses are my favorite flowers. And I chose Hilton because thats a cool
hotel and maybe people would think I was related to Paris Hilton and such. She is cool.
2- If I had to lose one of my senses it would be smell. Some people smell bad and personally I don't want to smell them
and it's rude to plug your nose. Dog poop smells bad too. My step dad couldn't smell anything for a long time (until he had
surgery) and he turned out just fine...I think.
3- If I could eliminate one specific type of prejudice from the Earth forever it would be racism. Black people say white
people can't jump, but that isn't true at all. White people in fact can jump high as black people and sometimes even higher.
We can jump high and far! Mexicans can jump too, how do you think they got to the US? (Just kidding...Kinda) And Asian people
can jump too. The color of our skin or shape of our eyes doesn't effect how high we can jump! We are all people here that
can jump if we put effort into it! Racism is the worst kind of prejudice because we judge people before we get to know them.
4- If I could put a secret camera in any room in the world it would be in my room! I want to see what goes on while I'm
sleeping or not there. I swear someone comes and steals my underwear and I want to know who it is! If it was you give them
back!
5- If I could ask God one question it would be: Why is the Earth round? He could have made it something interesting like
a cube or possibly a pyramind. I would ask him that because I want to know! A circle is so gay. I want something interesting!
6- The worst thing a friend could do is make love to "Jenny" because she is very ugly and also very fat and I hate her.
If a friend did that to me I would disown them and not claim them as my friend. When people asked me if I knew that friend
I would say "I don't know what dirty whale humper!"
7- If I could elminate one odor from the world it would be the dreaded body odor...dun dun dun...also known as B.O! Ask
"Jenny", she knows. Anyway it is the worst smell and it makes me want to puke! It's sick, I think everyone should agree.
8- If I could put a tattoo on anyone it would be my little sister. I would put it on her forehead and it would read "I
HAVE DISEASES!" Then no one would talk to her except other freaks with diseases and then her life would be miserable.
9- If I could select any site in the world to be wed it would be at a nude beach. Everyone would be jealous of my husband
cause they'd see how hot I look naked. And I would feel free and not have to waste money on a dress I'm only gonna wear once.
After we got married we go have mad sex in the ocean.
10- My single most fear is volcanoes. They are very scary and I never want to be near one because spewing hot lava might
mess up my beautiful face and my small waist that tapers to my perdy backside.
11- The one thing that ALWAYS makes me angry is when my underwear is missing. Those damn underwear gnomes! I work hard
for my underwear, and those poopheads take them without asking! I bought most of my underwear with my hard earned allowance
doing absolutely nothing.
12- If I could be invisible for a day I would go to places and cause mayhem! I would push people down and they wouldn't
know who did it! And I would drive cars and it would freak people out. At stores I would whisper into peoples ears "Steal
this". And I would kill all the people I don't like.
13- If I could put a secret listening device in any room it would be mine. Once again it's because of the underwear gnomes.
I want to hear the pitter patter of their tiny feet and their high little voices as they shout "I got the underwear! Make
way for the batmobile! Yah!"
14- If the United States had to give up one state I think it should be New Mexico. They should because it has the word
Mexico in it so they should just give it to Mexico. Plus there's nothing but Mexican cowboys in it anyway. Who cares?!
15- If I could wake up tomorrow to find all the newspaper headlines were about me they would say "SAMANTHA the most beautiful
girl is the world! She has a cute bottom! Also very beautiful hair and eyes!" I would want every person that isn't already
jealous of me to be jealous of me and then I would laugh at them and make them open doors and stuff.
Those are the 15 best ones! I had to do 45 but I didn't want to type them all. I really turned those in to my pyschology
teacher. I got a 426 out of 450 points! Oh and I know the whole thing sounds pretty racist and stuck up but I'm really not
like that...it was all made up for the most part...except the underwear gnomes...
